It doesn't matter if you don't win.You still get $80,000

Oscar nominees left disappointed at next weekend's star-studded ceremony will be comforted by a lavish goodie bag, valued at close to $80,000 (€58,000).

Distinctive Assets, a Los Angeles-based marketing firm, has been offering "celebrity swag" for 15 years now to non-winners in the Best Actor, Best Actress, Supporting Actor, Supporting Actress and Best Director categories, according to a press release. 

The contents of said bag of treats, revealed by US magazines, include such delights as luxury vodka, fine art, aerial circus lessons and…pepper spray guns (scroll down to see list).

Plenty of pet care products are also thrown in to the mix, along with holiday packages to Hawaii, Las Vegas, Japan and the Canadian Rockies.

The LA-designed hampers also offer weight loss shakes, personal training sessions, hair restoration surgery and even a bizarre procedure that "rejuvenates and enhances the genital tissue of a woman".

Leonardo Dicaprio

 The  list in full

ARTAS Robotic Hair Transplant surgery

Walk Japan tour

Best of Vegas holiday package

Halo natural pet food (host Ellen DeGeneres is an ambassador and actors can donate the food to an animal charity of their choice)

Rocky Mountaineer train trip

Imanta Mexico holiday package

Dr Charles Runels' O-Shot procedure to enhance sexual response

Steamist home spa system

Koala Landing resort stay in Kauai

Epic pet health therapy

Gizara arts print

Huntley Drive fitness training sessions

Krystal Klear filtered water system

Max Martin shoes

Le Petit Cirque lessons

A house call from respected acupuncturist Heather Lounsbury

Amy Adams

Jan Lewis bracelet

Slow watch made in Switzerland

Acure skincare

Jitseu handbags

Narrative clip camera

Rouge organic maple syrup

Coolway Go Pro hairdryer

Mace pepper spray guns

Polar Loop activity tracker

M3K beauty products

Horse shampoo for humans

Chocolatines of flavours including 'chocolate-dipped bacon', 'chianti wine with olive' and 'champagne brut with bleu cheese bark'

Knit & Co cable knit mittens

Slimware portion control dinnerware

Betty Jane candies

Blossoms Blends tea

Hydroxycut weight loss products

Dosha herbal tea lollipops

Aviv 613 vodka

Cannonball wine

Bee Free Honee organic apple honey

Wrag Wrap sustainable gift wrap

Simon's Happy Pet shampoo